#051: Why Incompatibility Is What You Need In A Partner - with Dr Kalanit Ben-Ari PhD
*Talking can be the most dangerous thing couples do. Today with the magnificent Dr Kalanit Ben-Ari, a relationship therapist, Chairperson of Imago UK, author, speaker, therapist supervisor and parental advisor, we cover:
Why compatibility isn’t what we think it is.
+ The first year is not always a smooth sailing, problem-free honeymoon, Kalanit explains why some of us stumble in the first year whilst others on the seventh. Neither are a good or bad sign but it’s how you handle it that’s key.
+ How to deal with conflicts with our partners and why they are “gold” in the IMAGO philosophy.
+ How to grow and become a better partner for them or the next one (they leave, they lose).
+ How to forgive ourselves and our partner - feelings of guilt and shame, anyone?
+ Why it’s important to not paint your partner as the bad one during conflicts but to remember the good parts.
+ How to express an issue without it being a big deal aka without your partner feeling attacked.
+ How to not lose yourself in a relationship and why it happens.
+ Knowing the difference between: Needing space in service for yourself or in service for the relationship?
+ Is breaking up always the end?
Reference used for this episode: Getting the love you want by Dr. Harville Hendrix and Dr. Helen Hunt
Come find Dr Kalanit at kalanitbenari.com Books on Amazon: Small Steps to Great Parenting & The Lost Book
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*Recorded in Nov 2020